Happy New Year 2016

Is it that time again already?

You can count on New Year's Eve to come exactly one week after Christmas Eve every time. But somehow, the ending of the year can still seem to sneak up on me. But...but...wasn't it just Memorial Day? Fourth of July? This year was even a bit more of a shock because we didn't have any snow until earlier this week, and that was more than 12 inches! It just didn't feel much like December and winter before then (to me, anyway.)

But it is that time of year no matter what. It's a holiday, so I write. And I reflect.

Earlier today I thought, "Wouldn't it be nice to get a do-over on some years?" Don't most of us wonder what today would be like if we had made any number of different choices? But "what if" can make your head spin. I've watched enough shows involving time travel to know that it's not as easy as it would seem. What's the concept...the butterfly effect. One seemingly minor change in the past can have immense consequences on the present...or future...or one version of the present...or...wibbly wobbly timey wimey stuff. (See? Time travel is complicated!)  As someone who is grateful for TV episodes that start with, "Last time on...," I doubt I could keep track of which one thing in the past I would want to change and which things should be left alone. Life is one big choose-your-own-adventure story. Each choice directs the path to new choices. Change one, and the whole picture changes.

I was reminded of one of the toasts I shared with my family last Christmas: 

Don't worry about the future;

the present is all thou hast.

The future will soon be present,

and the present will soon be past.

The past is done and gone. Cherish the good parts and learn from the not-so-good. And the future is never really within our grasp. Plan for it, anticipate it, wonder about it, but before you know it, it will be here and then gone. If I don't live in the present, I'll totally miss it.

As I was writing this, another comparison came to me. I'm a fan of series premieres and finales. How exciting to catch something right from the beginning as well as see it get a proper ending. But if those were the only two episodes of a series I watched, I'd miss out on all the good stuff in the middle! So I can be psyched for the start of a new year. January 1 is the premiere. And I can have fond memories about the old year. December 31 is the finale. I'm going to make sure to catch every important moment in between.

Perhaps I just need to remind myself of this now and again. Luckily for me, December 31 gives me that opportunity.

As we say farewell to 2015 and welcome to 2016, I'll close with another of those toasts.

Here's to the bright new year,

and a fond farewell to the old.

Here's to the things that are yet to come

and the memories that we hold.

May you find something to celebrate every day in 2016!

Happy New Year 2013

Happy New Year 2014

(Apparently I had no inspired words at the beginning of 2015.)

Christmas Newsletter to Dad 2015

Hi, Daddy!

It's that time of year again. How can it be that five years have passed since you left this life? In 2010, we had just had a good old snowstorm. I had on your red hunting coat and was just about to head outside to start shoveling when Mother called. This year we're experiencing unseasonably warm temperatures (mid to upper 50s!) and haven't had any snow to speak of. No two days, or two years, are ever alike.

So, I try to write to you every year at this time. It's one small way I feel I can honor you and remember you somewhat publicly. I've read my posts from previous years, which is a little trip down memory lane for me. And I share different old photos of you on Facebook. They make me smile. Go ahead and say it: I almost talk to you more now than I did when you were as close as a phone call. Of course, that was in the days of pricey long-distance rather than unlimited minutes, and you weren't much of a "phone" guy anyway, so I think you're OK with it this way in the long run. Even though this isn't a traditional two-way conversation, I believe you're still there for me, as you've always been. A dad always finds a way to check up on his kids, especially when they don't know he's doing it. Thank you for always loving us through work, in play, with words, and with actions.

Let's see, what kind of grown-up stuff have I been up to... You probably noticed we've been making several trips to Minnesota over the last few months. (REALLY glad we have a reliable vehicle!) I've done most of the driving to, from, and IN the greater Twin Cities area. I wouldn't want to do it often, and I still don't like it, but we all do what we've gotta do. And though it might not sound like much to those who don't know me, I consider it a personal accomplishment of which I can be proud. Got my new glasses for this year. Finally got them in blue ("my color"), and so far I like them. Still don't like to admit I've got bifocals, though. There are times, of course, that you just can't beat a regular old magnifying glass. I'd been long overdue for a trip to the dentist, so I bit the bullet (pun intended) and paid them a visit. Yes, a few cavities, but not the worst it's ever been. Went to see a stand-up comedian with another couple. He wasn't quite as much fun to see in person as he has been to watch on television, but it was something I'd only dreamed of being able to do. Oh, and I had that one test that 50-year-olds are supposed to have (only two years later than recommended). It was way easier than I'd expected it to be. I imagine we'd have shared a few amusing anecdotes with each other about that one. Had our annual girls' weekend. (It's starting to be a bit of a jinx, as I'm sure you're aware. Extra heavenly support for that issue, if you could, please.) No big plans while we're up there. Just some alone time, and some girl time, and some lay-around-in-pajamas-and-watch-TV-time. I know you can appreciate the importance of an opportunity to get away from it all, whether it's a few days or a few minutes. For me, this is the equivalent of your time in the back yard by the fireplace or in the basement with one of your many hobbies. Speaking of... my photo of your multicolored hand artwork is one of my favorites, and some of my friends get a kick out of it, too. Bet you never thought anyone outside of the family would see it, much less like it!

Here at home, we have our own set of...stuff. But when I remember to open my eyes and look around, it's clear that everyone does, and many of those issues are much bigger than anything I try to tackle on an average day. So I take a deep breath and try to find joy in everyday moments: a cardinal in the back yard, a starry night sky, Christmas lights in the neighborhood. 

If this were a wedding anniversary, tradition would suggest a gift of wood. But it isn't, and I don't think you'd want a salad serving set or a new cutting board anyway. So I'll try to offer some wood imagery instead. You are still part of this tree's roots that keep me grounded. And I try to keep branching out with the strength I didn't know I had but you gave me long ago. OK, so sometimes it's just tiny steps rather than leaps and bounds, but every branch starts with a tiny bud, right? Is that getting too poetic and philosophical for you? Sorry...it's late, and I'm just trying to put into words things that I feel inside but don't usually say.

That's all I've got for now. It feels good to stay in touch this way, but I'm glad you're still peeking in on us and listening to me whenever I need to chat. Remember...stay with the group!

Merry Christmas, Daddy.

03/03/32 - 12/12/10

P.S. Yes, I blew out the candle before I went to bed (even checked it twice). Some things DON'T change.

2014 Letter to Dad
2013 Letter to Dad
2012 Letter to Dad
2011 Letter to Dad