The second milestone? Today is my 50th birthday (cue the horns, singing, and confetti)! No, I'm not afraid to promote myself in this manner, even to the point of revealing my age. Birthdays are something to enjoy! I'll confess it has started as, and will likely end as, a fairly low-key day. I had no plans to cook but instead went to a local joint for a tasty burger and cheese curds. Then I will enjoy the season premiere of "Castle" on TV. I've gotten cards and texts and Facebook posts wishing me happiness. I've got chocolate and cookies and SPAM spread (my mother knows me so well!). For what more could a girl ask?
So I've been wondering. What makes 50 different than 49? Over the last few months I've been wavering about how I would react to hitting this age. Not unexpectedly, there has been anxiety about getting "old." Where did my youth go? At other times, I've felt almost proud, as if I could take credit for being born in the autumn of 1963. Back to a hint of sadness that the years seem to pass so quickly, followed by the anticipation of another new chapter beginning in my life.
A dear friend beat me to 50 by a few months. She shared that when she was concerned about reaching a new demographic check-box, she was told to not worry: Zeros have no value. Becoming 50 (or 30 or 80, for that matter) isn't any different than the last or the next birthday. Sure, there are special greeting cards designed for the "zero" years, but it's still just one more year of living. We sometimes put too much negative emphasis on these 10-year increments. It's a good thing for class reunions, but celebrating ourselves needs to happen much more frequently.
On the other hand, I read another quotation somewhere. I don't recall it precisely, nor can I credit the source, I'm afraid. The gist of it: If you look at a zero, you see nothing, but if you look through it, you can see everything. That makes sense. Instead of staring at a big 5-0, I can take a look at things that brought me here and peek ahead at what still lies ahead. My 50 can be part mirror, part crystal ball. It's all a matter of perspective.
This morning I greeted my birthday on Twitter: Well, hello, 50. I've been expecting you. I have heard a lot about you, but I look forward to becoming better acquainted.
I'm going to try to truly keep that mindset. I'm not worried about turning 50. I'm eager to see what life has in store for a woman "my age." And I hope to not take so long to compose my next 100 blog posts.
One other thing popped into my mind as I was enjoying each of the posts my friends added to my Facebook timeline. It's really a self-esteem booster to receive so many greetings! I was reminded of "It's a Wonderful Life." Clarence the angel reminds George Bailey that "...no man is a failure who has friends." Today, I suggest that it's also true that no man (or woman) is "old" who has friends.
Thank you, friends, for keeping me young, even at 50.
Happy birthday to me!
